Sunday, September 19, 2010

Master Doodles

To say that thinking about grad school has been troubling is a heck of an understatement.

See what I mean?

The truth is, I worry about putting myself through it again. I worry about neglecting Sam and my responsibilities as a wife to work on projects. Lord knows, once I put my mind to something it HAS to come out right. More than anything, I worry that life will for two years become one mindless all-nighter after another, where nothing else happens in my life except for what gets or doesn't get done. I worry that I will neglect my relationship with God. What if I happen to die in the midst of all that? What would I be able to tell God I did with my life and with the gifts he blessed me with?

Tonight we prayed about this. We pray that God will leads us toward the path that He wants us to follow.. whether we take the path slowly or at a frenetic pace, only He knows. The ONE thing I feel truly, madly, deeply passionate about is starting a family with Sam, being a good wife to him. If God decides to bless us with this event, this would be the biggest trump card of all, as far as grad school goes. It would take me years to get the degree, but I probably wouldn't care because we'd be parents.

I just need to stop worrying.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Rest in Peace

I just found out in a weird sort of way that a girl I went to high school and graduated with in Venezuela is dead. To say that I'm shaken up is a heck of an understatement.

I didn't know her very well; she was part of the "cool crowd" and I wasn't. She was one of the pretty girls who could at times be nice and joke around with us, but most of the time it seemed like her bubble was just too little to let anyone who wasn't popular (or rich) in. Our graduating class was made of less then 65 people though; so everybody knew everybody, popular or not. We used to make fun of her last name (it was Salvisberg).

According to news reports from two years ago, she was attending a private university in Mexico, and during her free time she was a female escort for rich men. She was addicted to cocaine. She met with a few friends at a large get-together; then disappeared. Two months later, her body was found in a remote area in Mexico. She'd been tortured and strangled.

An old friend of hers wrote in this online forum and defended her, saying that those who knew her didn't believe any of the things reported on the news because she wasn't like that. I didn't know her well enough, but I feel such a big urge to pray for her. And for her family.

Rest in Peace, Maria Jose.